Ned Kelly’s well know quote,’Such is Life’ became the hook for the track after Milky Milo and James called up talking about their lack of sleep.

Such Is Life

This week Sylvester called in and mentioned that he has been renovating so he has been unable to use the kitchen. This resulted in a debacle which included his Morris Minor, a pizza oven and foam balls flying throughout a shopping centre. Catherine also called in. She asked for a song for her partner of 26 years, Phil, whose 50th was coming up. Friend of a Friend is a marriage of these two tales.

Friend of a Friend
It all started at the local pub
Friend of a friend, the Collingwood Club
He had a voice that shook the wall
and they shook it on down to Smith st

Phil was working out Bundoora way
Cath would visit him and they’d while the hours away
Hours into days, years to remember
At a party in September

Just a friend
Come on honey help me take this bend
Devoted to the rivers end
Friend of a friend

Morris minor, did it’s best
Didn’t have much, but they had reels by request
Comes a son, daughter too
And they shook it down to Patton Hill

How many dinners, how many tears
Same black pot after all these years
A hundred kisses for a hundred fears
And we’ll shake it on down the river

This week Michael called in and offered a really enigmatic verse:

The thing that Michaels verse brought up for me was being in a relationship forever and trying to navigate the ever more complex and tricky paths.

Evening Tide
Forty long years in the desert
Wandering broke around you
Now you say you regret it
It’s all I ever wanted to do

When I met you we had boards and nails
Tough times from the start
We said we’d sail away
Build a heathen ark, for our love

We carve a road on the river
You can’t say we never tried
And if the boat is drifting
It’s just the evening tide

The brief for this week was ‘I missed out a big party last night and keep hearing about it.’

Start a Fire
Start a little fire now
Two sticks together and a Saturday night
Don’t go down without a fight
Start a little fire now

Come on Sonny let’s follow the crowd
To the park hangin’ off of the edge of town
King Cole’s playn for one last time
We’re gonna start a little fire

People sayin’ that it’s gonna to be big
Heaps o peachy girls and a big rig
Rock stars in civvies & it’s gonna kick

This week two stories were combined into the one personality.
The first caller was Kristen who wanted to know whether he should go out for lunch and drink more alcohol or stay at home with the kids. The other caller was Simon who couldn’t get the Basset hound off the bed.

What was it you said?
Another day in the life
The sun is sharp as a knife
And I wander around and I can’t get the hound off the bed
What was it you said

Another Sunday lunch
Pub of happy punters and I wonder will I have a few
Call the wrecking crew
I don’t care
What was it you said
It’s running around my head

What was it you said?

Today’s caller was after a motivational song for a Cyclocross event.

Cyclocross Lovers
Wind in your hair
Mud everywhere
White knuckle grip
Dirt mosh pit
Racing thru the highlands
Darebin parklands
Hell for leather
Cyclo-crossed lovers

She’s wearin black
Lost in the pack
Roars like thunder
She’s goin under
Blood on the tracks
Flat on her back
Hell for leather
Cyclo-crossed lovers

Falling down, spinning roun
Gotta get up
Bunnyhop
Outta the mud

Back in the saddle
Pedal pedal
Over the fence
Down in the trench
Cyclo-crusade
Bike track rage
Hell for leather
Cyclo-crossed lovers

Today we had two callers.Graham called in asking for a song about The Strade Bianche in Tuscany. Our second caller Frank’s idea was based on a true story based in Morocco where someone tried to buy his girlfriend for a thousand camels.

Love’s Marketplace
What do you want from me
I paid you in ecstacy
But baby you don’t want to see
White gravel road ahead

How much for the briefcase
Gave you what I got but you’re in my face
Take me to a dark space
What are we here for?
Down love’s market place

Woman needs a man like a camel needs a bicycle

We keep coming back for more
7 gold pieces laid on the dirt floor
Everybody’s trying to score
What are we here for
Down love’s market place

This episode Greg called in with a tale of encountering a Tiger snake at Sealers Cove. He and his love of 27 years managed to dance their way around the snake to safety.

Snake Dance
You got, what I want
You’re in my skin & you’re in my song
Baby there’s a place I want to go
Back to our roots at Sealer’s Cove

Baby you’re a tiger
You frighten my soul
27 years now
You’re makin me old

(Chorus)
I wanna do the snake dance honey with you
I wanna do the snake dance honey with you
Been around the block yeah baby it’s true
But you’re still the one I want to do it to

Pack it all up in a pick-up truck
Back to the land, come on and hold my hand
(x2)

(Chorus)

So I said ‘come with me, down to the sea
We get to windy saddle by the old gum tree
(x2)

You know me, my honey bee
Done with diggin’ trenches we’re free yeah

I wanna do the snake dance honey with you
I wanna do the snake dance honey with you
Been around the block yeah baby it’s true
But you’re still the one, you’re still the one
I want to do it to

Our old friend Greg called in to share his domestic drama of the week – losing the remote control. Yes this be the same Greg of ‘Pick up a shovel dig a hole for love’ and ‘Snake Dance’ fame (see previous RRR song challenges). In this week’s episode Greg and his flame discover they don’t need that smelly ole tele. They read books. He builds a pizza oven near the river that runs through their garden. Domestic blissorama. So this song ‘Turn Me On’ comes from the point of view of the teevee – abandoned & forgotten, listless & despondent..

Turn Me On
Turn me on, turn me off, turn me up
Coz I want you to want me
Turn me up turn me down turn me round
Coz I’d love you to love me

I see you lookin round the room,
You don’t see me,
Nothin’ I can do
I used to have a pwer over you
But now you found another way…. to get it on –

INST

The secret is out you don’t need me
I’m stakin’ you out you don’t see me
I’m shoutin’ your name but it’s just not the same
Need the stick of fire
Come on look harder
You can’t be tryin’
I’m really dyin’ here
You found another drug
Something to pick you up

Pick up a shovel dig a hole for love

Greg wanted to have his saturday morning lovin’ but instead he had to go out and dig trenches.

Dig A Hole For Love
Come on babe hug me ‘coz I’m feeling all right
It’s warm under the covers gonna take you for a ride
She says “Hold on baby what you tryin to do?
you knooow I can’t stay and get hot wich you -
‘coz the water’s risin, so quit you’re cryin and
Pick up a shovel dig a hole for love

Come on you know you want to have a boogie with me
I’m the love king – gonna send you out to sea
She says “Honey don’t you worry I got steam for you, but there’s
just a little thing that you got to do
Water’s rising, so quit your cryin and
Pick up a shovel dig a hole for love

Can you feel it, baby I’m for real, it’s
Now or never come on let’s get together and I’ll
make you feel all right come on hold me tight – she says
Pick up a shovel dig a hole for love